• December 4, 2013

who know what she said

who know what she said

who know what she said 1000 667 taylalynn

 

 

I am not superior to anyone else. Nothin I have is apart
from God, it’s all HIM. We are all equal in Gods eyes and I choose to meet
everyone I meet with respect. I will display meekness and gentleness at all
times. The Law of kindness on my tongue.

I won’t think of myself more highly than I ought to….I will
let god rate me 🙂

 

I have no authority to judge or be critical of other peeps. God alone s the judge. I will do

what I believe Jesus would do in every situation.

 

I read that this morning…In so many words.

 

I went to a meeting last night where the women talked about
self loathing and how that ain’t bein humble either.

 

Am I making sense? 

I at times feel like an outsider. Here and in TN. At home with my boys is the
only place I 100 percent of the time feel like I belong.

 

But my thoughts were challenged within my own head last
night. I read aloud to a group. I could feel people watching me and I thought
“Its my boots, my accent, maybe it’s the ombre in my hair?” and just weeks ago
I thought “I need to be me and wear my boots, my accent and get some ombre in
my hair”…See I am never really confident in myself. But where the thought
challenge came in is when someone read that sitting there thinkin everyone is
hatin you is not bein humble. Just means you still thinkin everyone thinkin
about you. Isn’t that crazy?! I do that!!!!!! I am new here so I want people to
like me so much and when I step out of line even a little I give myself..I give
myself…I give myself no room for growth, for error, I don’t love me the way I
love others.

 

I am going to see schools today for Tru. I am in the
process of writing a book and in doing so I put excerpts in the blog.
Turtally.com

I don’t write on the blog too much but when I do my family
usually just about shats they selves. Mama says since I am a reverend now I can’t
cuss and shat is not a cuss word.

 

Anyway….I write, I talk, I sing…I am fully myself some days,
like today and when I am in that place I share.

 

So this morning as I write I am taken back to that blog I
posted last year that caused my family to call me up…Telling me I would one day
regret writing so publicly, that I could affect Tru. I could affect how people
look at him. I do heed the warning and I do understand fully what this all
means.

 

So this morning I question my writings. Have a been to open?
I hear HIM when I ask this though y’all…..God tells me no..no you have not.
Follow your gut. MY GUT IS TO BE ME AND BE OPEN…So I must trust that I am not
so bad, so good, I am in the middle just like we all are. That my son will be
taken care of as we all will. I am not big enough to ruin anyones life as LONG
as I follow Gods will I am doing pretty good for a ole country girl today 🙂

 

Now who know what the topic is in this here insert….not me
but who care!

 

Xx Turts

 

 

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